Stuck in stupid situation - need bank account

Am new to the forum and thanks for letting me in. Sorry for my English which isn't my mother tounge. Feel free to ask if what I write sounds like nonsense to you.

I have a question about getting a bank account where I can recieve and send money (basically do online banking) and have a Mastercard. I have searched the internet for solutions to my situation but haven't found any, so I hope for a solution/advice thru this forum.

My situation:

I am a citizen of a EU country but have no address...

Stuck in stupid situation - need bank account